Like the pig that rolls in it's own filth, "Halloween Night" is very much aware of it's B-movie status and enjoys it to the fullest. If you're the kind of deviant that enjoys a healthy dose of gore and boobs, then you might like what Halloween has to offer. Just check out this rundown!
Death Count: 15 dead bodies
Best Kill: Coat hanger to the eye!
Nudity Level: Generous! Four naked ladies.
Best Nude Scene: Naked lady fighting.
Clearly this is a classic B-movie production, so keep in mind that while it delivers in some areas, it's still SUPER bad.
"Halloween Night" is a by the numbers slasher flick. Our killer/star is Christopher Vale who starts off as a normal child before witnessing his mother get shot in the face by masked men. Chris manages to hide during the ordeal, but unfortunately his living room seems to be located in a boiler room as a bullet ricochets off a fucking steam pipe and scalds his face.
But you don't look for logic in a B-movie, besides, they needed a good way to burn Vale's face so that we could get this wicked make-up job:
It looks ridiculous as fuck. As if someone slathered raw bacon and burnt jerky on his face. But you know what? I love it. I can't stand to look directly at it, it makes my stomach churn and I feel a little uncomfortable. It's like a child's drawing that's super terrible. You want to laugh at it, but then you see the earnest look in their eye and you realize they poured their heart into the monstrosity they're presenting you with.
In the worst case of bad detective work ever, Chris is blamed for his mother's murder and his father's suicide. One can imagine a detective pulling up to the scene and seeing one obvious suicide, a murdered woman and a child writhing in pain and then saying "Ah, the ol' 'burn my face off' alibi. Pretty clever young man, but I wont be falling for that one twice." So poor Chris is sent to a psych ward to live out his days.
In the worst case of bad detective work ever, Chris is blamed for his mother's murder and his father's suicide. One can imagine a detective pulling up to the scene and seeing one obvious suicide, a murdered woman and a child writhing in pain and then saying "Ah, the ol' 'burn my face off' alibi. Pretty clever young man, but I wont be falling for that one twice." So poor Chris is sent to a psych ward to live out his days.
Thankfully, as movies have taught us, psychiatric hospitals have terrible security and Vale escapes 10 years later and decides to return home to prove his innocence. Unfortunately, he discovers that a bunch of teenagers/people in their late 20s playing teenagers are using his home for a giant Halloween party. So in order to prove his innocence, Vale has to obviously murder them all.
Meet the whitest white kids you'll ever meet and the heroes of our story. You don't even need to know their names. There's Lesbian White Girl 1 & 2, White Nerd and White Nerd's Girlfriend. Not pictured here are Lead White Guy and Lead White Girl. I guess the best thing you can say is that there isn't a token minority sacrifice running around the movie jibbing and jivving and acting all "ethnic." Instead we make do with the empty husks that are presented to us as "characters."
However, there is one memorable character in the cast. Imagine if Fonzy and Dirty Harry had a kid and you'd have Daryl, the most baddest of asses to ever live.
Leather jacket? Sunglasses? Smoking a cigarette? In a rock and roll band? Daryl is a bad dude to the 10th degree. When he gets picked up for the party, Daryl casually asks "Are we gonna have a lot of hotties tonight?" And of course the only response to such a wild question is "Dude! YOU ARE SO FUCKING CRAZY!" And indeed, Daryl is fucking crazy.
Daryl is asked to come to the party to start some fake drama by taking a fake hostage and pulling a fake gun on a fake cop so that they can give everyone a good scare at the party. He starts by hitting on one of the Lesbian White Girls and notifies her that if "she ever gets tired of the taste of tuna" to come find him. Woooo, that was pretty fucking vile. Next Daryl shows how many fucks he gives by wearing his shades inside the house AT NIGHT.
The absolute best Daryl moment is when he flips the fuck out and takes a hostage at gun point. This hostage just happens to be Vale the killer wearing a costume as a disguise.
Imagine a scenario where in "Jason Takes Manhattan" a random street thug runs up and takes Jason hostage and Jason goes limp and pussies out. Cause that's what Vale does. He drops his weapon and starts freaking the fuck out. It's not like Vale had a huge amount of credibility as a slasher villain, but damn, you don't want the scary monster in your film pissing himself when confronted with a smarmy douche.
In the end, Vale manages to kill a bunch of hapless teens in some pretty standard ways. An axe to the face here, a throat slit there and so on and so forth. Though there is a fantastic moment where Vale gets into a fist fight with a naked woman and get his ass handed to him. Just when things are about to go sideways on our killer, Vale grabs a coat hangar and jabs it into the eye of his attacker.
By the end of it all, only the two leads are left alive to fight Vale. Through some magical Harry Houdini bullshit, Vale manages to switch places with the Lead White Guy so that the Lead White Girl accidentally kills him, thus setting up the movie for a potential sequel (not likely) and giving us the most awkward final shot ever. Vale manages to escape the police by hiding his face with a paper plate and then he climbs into a car with a shirtless redneck.
By the end of it all, only the two leads are left alive to fight Vale. Through some magical Harry Houdini bullshit, Vale manages to switch places with the Lead White Guy so that the Lead White Girl accidentally kills him, thus setting up the movie for a potential sequel (not likely) and giving us the most awkward final shot ever. Vale manages to escape the police by hiding his face with a paper plate and then he climbs into a car with a shirtless redneck.
Holy shit, this is how the movie ends. Our deranged paper plate mask wearing serial killer riding off into the sunset with a shirtless redneck in a convertible. Honestly, this is probably the most perfect ending this film could've possibly had.
"Halloween Night" is a B-movie that delivers, provided you have low expectations about the delivery. It is unforgivably stupid and the acting is atrocious, but it deals out the gore and nudity like candy on Halloween. It's also mercifully short, which should be a requirement of all B-movies.
"Halloween Night" is a B-movie that delivers, provided you have low expectations about the delivery. It is unforgivably stupid and the acting is atrocious, but it deals out the gore and nudity like candy on Halloween. It's also mercifully short, which should be a requirement of all B-movies.
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