What To Do If You See A Zombie

From the news reports, it looks like we're dealing with a mix of fast moving zombies and the slow shuffling kind.  Guess there's something for everyone.  So what should you do if you encounter one of the undead today? Here are a few protips to help you out.

1. If they're fast moving zombies, don't let yourself get caught out in the open.  Unless you're a marathon runner, you're going to get chased down.  They're zombies now, they may have been accountants or secretaries before, but now they're the undead with an insatiable hunger for flesh.  They will not stop chasing you.
2. If we're talking about the slow kind, do not walk up to them and try to taunt them.  It all starts with laughing and giggling until one of them gets a lucky lunge on you. Then it's "OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD! He's biting me!"
3. Don't run into a building you're not familiar with.  Whether it's the fast or slow kind, most deaths usually result from people backing themselves into a corner they can't get out of.
4. Don't stop and hide.  Zombies seem to have a knack for sensing the living.  It might be by smell, I'm not sure, but if you're nearby they just know it.  So if you attempt to hide in a car, you're just setting yourself up for disaster.  Before you know it they'll be swarming all over you.
5. If you have a weapon and you're facing off against one zombie, the easiest way to kill it is to take out it's legs first.  It's much easier to crush a zombie's head if they're on the ground.  Especially in the case of the fast moving kind.
6. Zombies are like ants.  Where there's one, you can bet there's more.  If you can, take out the zombie quickly before he has a chance to make any noise that may alert other zombies in the surrounding area.